Frank Salvatore
Health and Lifestyle

The Benefits of The Five Love Languages

February 1, 2017 by · Leave a Comment 

Because everyone shows their love differently, if you do not understand what your partner needs in order to be loved, conflict may arise. Couples often do not understand what their partner is looking for when they are unsuccessful in making them happy. Learning love languages is an effective way to understand differences and greatly help a relationship.

Although it may seem cheesy, the idea of the five love languages actually makes quite a bit of sense. Its concept is simple and can help a struggling relationship.

The Five Love Languages

Gary Chapman, a seasoned relationship counselor, found there are five emotional love languages, meaning five ways that people show and understand emotional love. It is important in a relationship to speak and act upon the love language of your spouse.

  • Words of Affirmation: Affection is expressed through words, praise, and appreciation.
  • Acts of Service: Actions are used to communicate love.
  • Receiving Gifts: Giving gifts shows the greatest act of love.
  • Quality Time: Giving each other undivided and undistracted attention.
  • Physical Touch: Physical touch portrays love.

While you can likely relate to more than one of these, most people have one or two that really stand out. Knowing the love language of your spouse helps you to understand them better.

When you are aware of your spouse’s needs, it can change the way you show them love, which will, therefore, improve how they feel love from you. For example, one may assume that their spouse’s love language is affection because that is their own. They may be offended when the spouse pulls away or needs their own personal space. Without knowing that affection is not their love language, some hurt feelings can occur due to this misunderstanding.

What is Your Love Language?

You likely have a good idea of what your love language is, but taking a quiz can help you consider it even more. This is helpful to determine which love language is the most important to you.

It is also very useful to know the ways that you don?t feel love. For example, if you rank low on physical touch, and your partner often reaches out to hold your hand, this may not mean much to you. At the same time, you may be hesitant to physically touch others, because it doesn’t mean much to you.

The Five Love Languages and Your Relationship

When you are aware of your spouse’s love language, you can empathize with them better. You may be able to better understand their position in a fight. If you can understand this, you are more likely to overcome the argument.

The concept of love languages is also helpful for simply maintaining a relationship. For example, if both partners feel that quality time is important, they can agree to put their phones aside and spend one on one time with just each other. When you are aware of your partner?s love language, it is much easier to reignite the relationship.

The five love languages is also a good tool in expressing your love in the most effective way. For example, you may think that buying your partner a lot of gifts for their birthday may show them how much you love them, but in reality, they may just want to spend some quality time with you.

Using Love Languages for Other Relationships

Knowing love languages can help in many different types of relationships aside from romantic ones. For example, a family member may become upset if someone else in the family fails to contact them on a regular basis. However, when you see this person, you may have deep, long conversations that are very meaningful. This can reassure love if you are aware of the other person’s love language.

It?s important to remember that your love language could possibly be different with different people. While you may speak one love language with your spouse, it may be completely different when interacting with your parents. While you may need quality time with your partner and family, you may not necessarily need it with your friends to know they care about you.

Knowing love languages can also help when it comes to business relationships. It can create and maintain a happy working team where everyone can feel appreciated and motivated.

In the end, it is helpful to know what is important to the people around you so you can better understand them. With everyone’s different backgrounds and life experiences, it is no surprise that people communicate differently. While love languages cannot fix every relationship, the concept goes a long way in improving communication, which is a vital part of a relationship.

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Frank Salvatore