Frank Salvatore
Health and Lifestyle

The Best Length of Time to Date Before Marriage

August 1, 2017 by · Leave a Comment 

As divorce rates have risen and fallen throughout the years, couples want to take every step they can before getting married to ensure that they will not become part of an alarming statistic. How can people prepare for marriage so they can be a little bit more sure that it won’t end in a divorce decree? New data has shown that one way couples are making sure their marriage will last is to date their partner for a longer amount of time before tying the knot. In fact, on average, couples are now dating for almost 5 years before getting married.

During this time, not only are they getting to know each other better, but they are setting up their lives for the long term. With college and other formal education, many people choose to focus on their career and put their relationships on the back burner until their lives are a bit more stable on their own.

But it doesn’t start there. Couples are now dating an average of 17 months before moving in together and then spending an average of 22 months living together before getting engaged. While marriages used to happen relatively quickly, the average engagement now lasts 20 months, meaning the average couple lives together for 3.5 years before getting married.

Also, while couples did not used to live together before getting married, almost 90% of couples now move in with each other prior to saying their vows. This may allow couples to get to know each other on a deeper level and possibly break up before getting engaged, realizing that they are not right for each other.

People are certainly waiting until later in life to get married than they used to. In the 1970s, women would marry around age 22 and men around age 24. These days, however, on average women get married when they are almost 31, while men get married when they are almost 33 years old.

People also choose to be in more serious relationships these days before committing to one person. Someone may have already lived with two other serious partners before deciding to commit to one person for marriage.

What’s more, while marriage used to be largely proposed by the man without the woman knowing it was coming, it is now often a partnership where both people make an equal decision to spend their lives together. Women may have felt social pressure in the past to get married, but these days women only tend to marry if they really want to spend the rest of their lives with the man. Couples now tend to have a frank conversation about their future together to make sure they are on the same page rather than the man just “popping the question”.

Making this choice together has led to happier and more successful marriages rather than marriages ending in divorce. If a couple waits until they absolutely know that they both want to spend their lives together, their bond is likely to be strong enough that it will be able to last through the years, rather than if they decide on a whim at a young age that they should get married.

The choice of when to get married is very personal and varies between each couple. Some people get married very young and never divorce and others wait years before getting married and it ends up disastrous. The point is if you are waiting to get married but are feeling some pressure from friends, society, or relatives, you can nicely point out that in these modern times, it?s completely normal to slow down and take your time.

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Frank Salvatore